I have made the choice not to live in fear. I leave the house at night, I ride the bus alone, and I will not let my life be ruled by fear.
But it’s still there. I am still aware, making choices to look you in the eye when I am walking alone at night. To cross to the other side of the street if I’m about to pass a man in the dark. I put my bag next to me on the bus to try to keep that seat unoccupied. Because for some reason you are less likely to touch my stuff than you are to touch me.
The life of a woman, any woman, is frought with fear. Our brains are constantly working, to make snap decisions about whether we can trust you or not. And you will never understand it. I find that very sad.
There is a difference between choosing not to let my fears rule me, and choosing to be a victim. A friend of mine was told that recently. That it is our choice to be a victim. And the person it came from was chewing on their own foot at the time, because I think I know what they were trying to say. But that came off so badly.
So stop telling us how we should act. Stop telling us what we should do. You are not us. If we say that you are creepy, then you are acting creepy. Deal with it.